Guide to Troubled Birds

Author: Mockingbird The Mincing
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 069817948X
Format: PDF, ePub, Mobi
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The Mincing Mockingbird Guide to Troubled Birds is an illustrated, pocket field guide that enables anyone to quickly identify psychotic, violent or mentally unstable bird species. Written in non-technical language for the layman, the guide describes where to find—or where to avoid—the most disturbed North American birds. Throughout the book the reader will discover tales of murder, assault, mental breakdowns, obesity, drug abuse and infidelity among the birds. This guide is used and recommended by law enforcement agencies and ignored by leading ornithologists. We are only just discovering the reality of our avian adversaries, with their reptilian brains, their appetites for mayhem and the fact that they fly mostly to spite us. To ignore the information found within this volume may be at the peril of your very life.

It Is Folly to Assume My Awesome Lies Dormant

Author: Matt Adrian
Publisher:
ISBN: 9780615358048
Format: PDF, ePub
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Matt Adrian's lush acrylic paintings of birds range from the delightfully cute to the decidedly sinister. Collected in this eighty-page, hardcover art book, these uniquely soulful portraits of a stunning variety of bird species seem to gaze out at the world with an intensity of feeling and emotion. Adrian's unique titles for the paintings seek to juxtapose the singularly primal existence of birds with that of the folly of modern human existence, leading to such titles as A Financially Unstable Mess, but at the Liquor Store They Call Me Ma'am and I Have Seen the Interiors of Cloud Formations That Make Your Cathedrals Look Like Wal-Marts. These titles combine with the vibrant paintings to make this a thoroughly entertaining volume unlike any other. Printed on the highest quality art paper, each vividly reproduced painting has been given a subtle spot varnish, adding to the richness of each image.

Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes

Author: Cory O'Brien
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 1101619678
Format: PDF, ePub, Mobi
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Get this: Cronus liked to eat babies. Narcissus probably should have just learned to masturbate. Odin got construction discounts with bestiality. Isis had bad taste in jewelry. Ganesh was the very definition of an unplanned pregnancy. And Abraham was totally cool about stabbing his kid in the face. All our lives, we’ve been fed watered-down, PC versions of the classic myths. In reality, mythology is more screwed up than a schizophrenic shaman doing hits of unidentified…wait, it all makes sense now. In Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes, Cory O’Brien, creator of Myths RETOLD!, sets the stories straight. These are rude, crude, totally sacred texts told the way they were meant to be told: loudly, and with lots of four-letter words. Skeptical? Here are a few more gems to consider: • Zeus once stuffed an unborn fetus inside his thigh to save its life after he exploded its mother by being too good in bed. • The entire Egyptian universe was saved because Sekhmet just got too hammered to keep murdering everyone. • The Hindu universe is run by a married couple who only stop murdering in order to throw sweet dance parties…on the corpses of their enemies. • The Norse goddess Freyja once consented to a four-dwarf gangbang in exchange for one shiny necklace. And there’s more dysfunctional goodness where that came from.

National Geographic Complete Birds of North America

Author: Jonathan Alderfer
Publisher: National Geographic Books
ISBN: 1426213735
Format: PDF, Kindle
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Examines more than eighty avian families, including an overview of plumage, behavior, distribution, taxonomy, and conservation, and describes all 962 species, covering identification, similar species, voice, status, and distribution.

George Washington Is Cash Money

Author: Cory O'Brien
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 039917348X
Format: PDF, Docs
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From Apache creation myths and Christopher Columbus's STD-ridden arrival on the shores of America, to Elvis, the Mole People, and Roswell, a humorous look at the seminal events and legends in US history. In George Washington Is Cash Money, readers will learn the absolutely true stories of: The UFO at Roswell was a weather balloon--patched up with floral-print scotch tape. The Salem Witch trials happened because a couple of teens wanted attention. Joseph Smith invented Mormonism by staring into a hat full of rocks. Elvis Presley watched up to three TVs at once, and changed channels by shooting them with guns.

The National Audubon Society Field Guide to North American Birds

Author: John L. Bull
Publisher: Alfred a Knopf Incorporated
ISBN: 9780679428527
Format: PDF, Mobi
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A revised edition of the popular field guide includes hundreds of all new, full-color photographs, along with information on diverse species of eastern birds, their characteristics, habitats and ranges, identification tips, and more. 200,000 first printing.

A Hummingbird in My House

Author: Arnette Heidcamp
Publisher: Crown
ISBN: 0307774074
Format: PDF, Kindle
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Anyone who has fallen under the spell of the hummingbird will treasure this lovable true story of a young ruby-throated hummingbird who becomes part of someone's household and life. 57 full-color photographs; 10 black-and-white drawings. From the Hardcover edition.

Beyond Birdwatching

Author: Ben L. Sill
Publisher: Peachtree Pub Limited
ISBN:
Format: PDF, ePub, Mobi
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Just when you thought you could take birdwatching seriously again, Ben, Cathryn, and John Sill have taken another laugh-out-loud look through their bizarro binoculars. This time even the birdwatchers themselves aren't safe. Just when you thought you could take birdwatching seriously again, Ben, Cathryn, and John Sill have taken another laugh-out-loud look through their bizarro binoculars. The world of ornithology will never be the same. This time even the birdwatchers themselves aren't safe. In Beyond Birdwatching, the Sills have turned their wicked wit on the entire world of birdwatching in a hysterical parody of your favorite birding magazine. Beyond Birdwatching offers the familiar magazine features, but with a twist. This is the perfect gift for the bird enthusiast in your life.